wow okay here it is

 ...a little gift i snuck in for little Edoardo!

SHUT UP EVERYBODY STOP TALKING AND FIGURATIVELY LISTEN TO THESE WORDS: I LEAVE TO ROME
T O D A Y.

In 12ish hours, I’ll be sitting on a shitty seat in the last row of Flight 136 beside a pack of wailing babies, lifting off toward tomorrow’s sunrise.

My nerves have formed what feels like a golf ball, lodged in my throat all week.  It’s like I’m constantly on the verge of throwing up, stripping down to my birthday suit, and locking myself in my bedroom and never leaving anywhere ever.  I haven’t taken a full breath since Saturday.  Five days ago, my stomach dropped and the little blue butterflies in my belly started to flap for their lives.  That feeling never went away, and now the butterflies have fluttered to each of my limbs, making my entire body feel like electrically charged jello.

Despite my hyperactive nerves, none of this feels real.  The only other time in my life where I’ve felt this way would be before the 2008 cross country Nike Team Nationals.  My team had a real shot at winning the national title, but only if each and every one of us ran perfectly.  I was the team’s number one runner at the time, so obviously there was extra pressure to place top 10.  It was freezing and my excuse for a uniform wasn’t doing much to fend of the inevitable post-race hypothermia.  And on top of all that, there was like, a really cute boy watching the race.  He was blonde and everything.  I was so nervous that day that I cried on the starting line.  I got a late start because as the gun fired off, I was desperately trying fix my mascara.  After all, there were photographers. 

I ended up breaking my leg in that race.  It essentially broke due to overuse.  I finished, but collapsed across the finish line like every heartfelt sports movie hero you’ve ever seen ever.

I have no idea what that anecdote means for this upcoming flight, but I can tell you that if I break my leg 35,000 feet in the air, I am going to lose my mind.

The past couple of weeks have consisted of excessive family bonding, goodbye dinner burgers, and racing around town to pick up another pair of underwear.  I also went to a big cat museum/zoo/center and watched a black jaguar rip apart a chicken.

I’m ready.  I’ve got some fancy man euros, comfy boot shoes, and a new toothbrush (Oral B wow great job!).  Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go pack.  Because I still haven’t done that yet.

Love and hugs,

Kay

P.S. i want to thank my family for being so incredibly wonderful and supportive and goofy and embarrassing and lovely.  i'll miss you loads, but I look forward to our excessive Skype-ings!